Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
