I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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