Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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