I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
