im drinking this country out of the recession.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
