I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
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