Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
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