Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Randomize
