would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
