Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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