As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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