Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(270): View more from Kentucky

T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.

(1-270): View more from Kentucky

I'm jealous

(270): View more from Kentucky

My throat feels like a candle.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?

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(315): View more from New York

We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme

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(563): View more from Iowa

I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.

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(310): View more from California

Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.

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(309): View more from Illinois

So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.

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