i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
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