hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
