What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
