The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I just googled if crying burns calories
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
