Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Randomize
