Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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