I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
