know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
