You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
