I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
