I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
It's never too late to be topless.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
