New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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