so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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