Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
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