Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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