He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
