i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
