I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
