Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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