Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
