Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Randomize
