When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
