Grow some girl-balls and come out already
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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