I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
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