Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Nicole vs. Life
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
