This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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