OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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