Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Randomize
