Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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