in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
