After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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