I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
