"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Randomize
