Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
