we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
