no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
