it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
We have started to decorate penises.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
