help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
50% drunk capacity currently
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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