remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Randomize